V-Day...

So we have reached the month of lurrrrrrrrve! Valentines Day is swiftly approaching and couples up and down the country will be planning how they're going to spend the day and what cheesy gift they can get their loved one this year.

 



I, being the singleton that I am, have no plans. This doesn't bother me I like being able to throw both of my hands ecstatically into the air when Beyonce belts out "Now all the single ladies put your hands up" I have therefore decided to dedicate this post to the 5 top reasons why I am single....



1. I find farting, burping and pooing absolutely hilarious, boys can find this a bit gross
2.  I live in a village where around 90% of the population are 80+ and I don't find false teeth attractive (not meaning to be picky or anything!)
3. My sarcasm knows no boundaries and often reaches levels that are rather irritating and stupid
4. I've set my standards a bit too high thanks to Noah from The Notebook, Jack from Titanic, Johnny  from Dirty Dancing, Prince Charming from Cinderella and ohh how the list goes on  
5. I secretly tell myself that one day at least one of the members of One Direction will realise what a catch I am and romantically sweep me off my feet and being the nice person I am, I'm therefore going to stay single so nobodies feelings get hurt...

Hope you have a lovely V-day regardless of where you are and who you spend it with! Thank you for reading.

X.